Going Through a Divorce in Washington
I'm going through a divorce — here's what Washington law says and what to do next.
What is going through a divorce?
Divorce is the legal process of ending a marriage. Every state now allows no-fault divorce, which means you do not need to prove your spouse did something wrong. You can simply state the marriage is "irretrievably broken" or cite "irreconcilable differences."
Some states also allow fault-based divorce on grounds like adultery, cruelty, or abandonment. In fault states, proving fault may affect how property is divided or whether you receive alimony.
Property division follows one of two systems depending on where you live:
- Community property (9 states including California and Texas) — assets acquired during the marriage are split 50/50
- Equitable distribution (41 states and D.C.) — assets are divided fairly based on factors like length of marriage, each spouse's income, and contributions to the household
Federal law does not directly govern divorce, but federal statutes affect related issues like the tax treatment of alimony (Tax Cuts and Jobs Act of 2017), division of military pensions (Uniformed Services Former Spouses' Protection Act, 10 U.S.C. § 1408), and division of employer retirement plans through a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) under ERISA.
What to Do If You're Going Through a Divorce
Step 1: Make sure you meet the residency requirement. Most states require you to have lived there for a certain period (usually 6 months to 1 year) before you can file for divorce.
Step 2: Gather financial documents. Collect tax returns (at least 3 years), bank statements, retirement account statements, mortgage documents, and credit card statements. You need a complete picture of marital assets and debts.
Step 3: File a petition for divorce with your county court. You will be the "petitioner" and your spouse will be the "respondent." There is usually a filing fee ($100-$400 depending on the state).
Step 4: Try to reach a settlement agreement. About 95% of divorces settle out of court. Mediation or collaborative divorce can save thousands of dollars in attorney fees and resolve things faster.
Step 5: If retirement accounts are involved, you will need a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) to divide employer-sponsored plans like 401(k)s and pensions without triggering tax penalties. This is a separate legal document — consult an attorney or QDRO specialist.
Step 6: Update your estate plan after the divorce is final. Change your will, power of attorney, health care proxy, and beneficiary designations on insurance policies and retirement accounts.
What you should NOT do
Don't hide assets. Courts require full financial disclosure in divorce. Hiding assets is fraud and can result in severe penalties, including the court awarding a larger share to your spouse.
Don't make major financial changes. Avoid large purchases, asset transfers, or closing joint accounts after filing. Most courts issue automatic temporary restraining orders that prevent either spouse from wasting marital assets.
Don't use children as leverage. Threatening to withhold custody to gain a financial advantage will destroy your credibility with the court and could hurt your custody case.
Don't represent yourself in a complex divorce. If you have significant assets, retirement accounts, business interests, or contested custody issues, hire a family law attorney. The cost of mistakes often far exceeds legal fees.
Don't sign a settlement agreement you don't fully understand. Once a divorce decree is finalized, it is very difficult to reopen property division. Get independent legal advice before agreeing to terms.
This page is general legal information for Washington, not legal advice for your specific situation. Laws change, and how a statute applies depends on facts we don't know. For advice on your matter, consult a licensed attorney in Washington.